What’s the real story behind multiple marriages?

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the current marriage rate is 6.8 per 1000 people. Not so shockingly, the current divorce rate is 3.4. This means that, right now, 50 percent of marriages are ending in divorce. And with half of all marriages ending in divorce, more and more people are finding themselves remarried and categorized as multiple marriers.

We’re talkin’ two, three, four and even five marriages. Maybe more. What are the facts behind these kinds of situations? What are the statistics and how does the multiple marriage pattern become established in the first place? Oftentimes, serial marriers are perceived by society in a relatively negative or less respectable manner… but why? What has really become the most interesting is the expectations that surround marriage and family life.

Today’s guest is a multiple marrier herself, Pam Evans. While Pam serves as the senior director in the high tech sector of a Fortune 1000 company, she also doubles as an author and public speaker on the subject of multiple marriages. She has not only been featured on the Bay Area Independent Publishers List, but also on last summer’s Top 12 Book Pick List on “Spirited Woman.” She’s here to discuss the myths and truths of being a serial marrier.

To find out more about Pam and her adventures as a multiple marriage expert, check out her book Ring EXchange and visit her website.

In a marriage, what are the building blocks of trust?

According to the dictionary, trust is defined as “the assured reliance in the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something.” Having it is a critical factor and also the main foundation for any relationship, whether it’s a friendship, a parent-child relationship, or a marriage. Once trust is broken and an individual no longer feels that he or she can rely on their partner, the bond of faith can be very challenging to repair and rebuild.

Within a relationship, trust issues can stem from a multitude of problems–anything from emotional or physical affairs and hidden addictions to secrecy and lying. However, more subtle behaviors from spouses like constantly being late, being unreliable, or being insensitive can also shake the foundations of trust and honesty.

Today’s guest, Dr. Sara Salter of Wynns Family Psychology in Cary, NC, says the way to build strong, lasting trust within your marriage is to focus on certain specific factors including communication, openness and empathy. In addition to those, Sara has other important pointers and tips on how to build and maintain an unbreakable level of trust within your marriage.

To find out more about Sara and her practice, visit their website or call (919) 467-7777 to schedule an appointment.

How can you tell when your partner drinks too much? When does drinking become a problem?

Imagine meeting someone new. You start going out on romantic dates- dates that maybe include a bottle of wine, candles, roses, the whole nine yards. Initially, the alcohol acts as an intimacy and romance enhancer. It helps you both loosen up, relax, and enjoy yourselves. But what happens when down the road the alcohol becomes toxic? Sometimes stress and tension build up and eventually it’s one partner who drinks too much, too frequently.

When one partner begins to develop a drinking problem, the other might start to feel like the alcohol has taken top priority in the relationship. Any little bit of consumption could start to be a bid deal, and the partners could begin to withdraw from each other, creating an even bigger issue. With communication mishaps and increased fighting, oftentimes married partners don’t know how to go back and fix the issue.

Today, Dr. Julia Messer is talking with us about how to handle this issue if and when it arises. As a licensed psychologist with Orenstein Solutions in Cary, NC, she helps couples and individuals develop practical coping solutions for many different challenging situations.

To find out more about Julia and her practice, visit their website or call (919) 428-2766 to make an appointment.